Have had the weekend off to relax ye old brain, bin getting really into it all, and now am back on it. Im trying to find a happy compromise.
The key to the social commentary element (which I haven't really gotten over in the pitch or the anamatic) will be looped segments - people doing lobotomous tasks - shelf stacking, ironing, cleaning, drinking - etc. This will be the crux of the social commentary.
So what i've done is worked that into it a whole deal more. Jean's on the phone, but we also see her loop'd putting stuff away, doing the ironing etc.
It's looking quite good, and hey ho, i've managed to cut a whole minute off the breakfast conversation scene, which keeps the pace moving much better.
Here's a few bits n' pieces that I forgot to post.
I don't know if I mentioned, but I'm going to set the film in Falmouth. I thought 'why not'. It wont be perfectly Falmouth - there'll be no 'welcome to Falmouth!' shots. Think Falmouth if it were a little more down trodden and desolate... basically I just want to set it here to have a visual reference on my doorstep. QUITE LITERALLY
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