Showing posts with label thought. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thought. Show all posts

Scribbled secret notebooks

I think I know what's comin'. We got a burgeoning spirituality on the horizon of our society. It's there n it's growin. Mindfulness on the NHS.. Meditation in schools. (I am excited to see these kids grow up..!). It makes sense hence it's growin'. Its nice to be nice. It's natural to love. Hence it's growin. It may take time but it'll come in thru the door, eventually. When we allow it. Because the arch of the moral universe is long but it bends towards justice.

Contempt for this modern society is where we're at. You see it all around. Fashion advertisements fronted by sullen expressions. Holywood & X-Factor, flogging dead horses to tired eyes. Contemporary art with it's leanings towards disorder, chaos, & sometimes ugliness. The absolute apathy to change abound.The decline of the West (Oscar Spengler), these are seemingly the end days, were we put all that former-prosperity to bed.

Right now contemp. Art seems all about edgyness & graffiti & messy paint & sullen expressions. Nah fuck that. That's like Topshop, frownin' down on us & on our faces too when we find ourself in their shirts.

But we'll get tired of this contemptious outlook, and thus will be the trajectory. Inspired will be the step forward. Love will be the landing place.

Art will help society get there. Paint a picture of a pretty place & watch all birds fly to it.
Art will help allow it. Share a smile, see a smile.

Lets see a smile.
Not cus I'm dull & unrealistic. Or ignoring the truth.
I see the truth and its loooove! It's creativity. It's compassion. It's one big organism prodding itself towards glory.

So I ain't talkin about ignorance is bliss. Or turnin that frown upside down. Nothhiin mechanical. All natural. Progressive & alive.

Pick up the baton of impressionism! Lets take one step back, take a deep breath in and cough sideways all the monotonous laboured speech of modern art. One step back, & two ever-forward.

Lets see in the souls of men the light that Monet painted.

Let us see the sadness too! Sure, perhaps it'll be warming sadness, not sullen, 'whatcha gunna do about it' loneliness.. Warming sadness, like the empathy Dylan brings in yr ears as he sings n you agree-inside.

Related:

Recent paintings

A couple of recent paintings:



Here's a couple of new paintings. I think they somewhat represent a bit of a pivot point with my painting. The 1st two paintings (of Lennon & Charlie Chaplin) are in line with what I've been doing for a long time. That's probably the 5th or 6th of Lennon i've done, likewise of people like Dylan etc. Idol painting. I always sorta considered it just an expression of grattitude rather than art; paintings usually done in a fevour of being wrapped in one of their albums*.

But the third painting, the one of my friend Todd, represents a bit of a departure point from this. For a while I've had an idea in mind for how I want to paint and have not been able to reach it. What tends to happen is; I begin the painting, then my conservatism mutes any sorta progress of it evolving into something new, as a result of a desire to just 'round off a nice painting'. Altho this has resulted in some 'nice paintings' its also deliberated progress. e.g with this one of my friend Dena. It's a nice painting, but I wanted to say so much more with it, and instead it came out as quite flat(in the material sense), and just a rendering of her physical beauty, and my skill with the medium, rather than saying anything deeper:

So the one of my friend Todd, (which unfortunately by the way the colours on the camera came out a little skewed so it's not quite right on here) When you look at it, it doesnt appear like a massive step forward, but it just feels like a gentle push in the right direction. This is probably about 5/10% of my intent. What I want is to be able to paint these paintings where it just feels like LIFE has been blown together by the winds, all leaf-like-brush-strokes blown about the canvas in disarray, but in the centre, a face to come together - to express the random emergence and miraculousness-nature of life happening. To express also how we come from nothing, blown together for this moment.

*to return to what I was saying about those 'idol paintings', I feel too that these are sort of the pinnacle of that, atleast with the intent of them. The Lennon one, altho its not bang on so not great, what I like about it is the mash-up of elements; it has a bit of a graffiti-street art style to it (with the heavy black stencil-esque outline) but also with the golden glow it (to me atleast) kinda feels like a golden buddha head seen somewhere in our memories. Also the use of cardboard, was, tobe honest just because im poor, but also I like that it represents the 'working class hero' angle to it. That's why I did Chaplain too, the one of him I'll just call 'the tramp' and see who gets it.

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I went to the Musee D'orsay the other day and was totally blown away.. Manet, Monet, Courbert, Degas, Van Gogh, Renoir.. really blown away. After leaving there felt really like my eyes could just look at life with the delicate caress & desirous-intrigue of their oils.. It was a very poignant thing to do too, as I spent the next week in a place called Plum Village, surrounded by monks, and beautiful people all being peaceful and joyous. Whilst there, I felt too that being mindful ( being in the moment, 'reared to the moment' is the phrase that kept coming to my mind ),to look at the world like this is to look at the world like a painter weighing up-with gentle-intent - the world infront of him. Its a feeling art students may trace the whispers of when they really look in life drawing.

Van Gogh is a good epitomy of that. When you stand infront of one of his canvases, you can really feel the ripples of life about the scene he's capturing.. all the motions in the air and connections of energy between all things.. how a man may seep into the canvas, and may emerge with a bold line of action also.. a tree likewise may be exploding from the earth or plaintively bobbin on the waves of energy abound.

Anywho, will cut it there. Its all about feeling and you can't capture feeling with words, only point to it. But i think what Im pointing to more is my ecstacy & rapture., but perhaps thats an indicement more important than trying to capture feeling with words.. anywho, Thanks for reading. Peas

the importance of moving

"The only thing I knew how to do was to keep on keepin' on"

In my life now, I tend to find myself moving round alot. I have thought of myself as a traveller for a while, but this isn't strictly true; I realised the other day I haven't left the country (beside a week or two holidays) for a couple of years now, and I've never been away longer than three months; Likewise I've never felt the aliveness of not knowing I would return. I've tended to have about 5 weeks out the country at a time when I get away, and steadily, my trips have got closer to home and less grandiose. Coincidentally (or not so..) this has coincided with my university loan running dry, and my pockets getting ever thinner. But that's ok, it's only served me to take more modest trips. If you wanna keep moving you move regardless.

But it's been nice - I've sorta just become always on the move. I tend to stay in a place for about two months, I spose that's just about enough time to get a grasp of the place. Right after uni it was most extreme; two months at home (feet up, flat out), two months in Plymouth, two in Mevagissey, two in Torquay (home again), 5 weeks goin' round East Europe, two back in TQ (working), back to Plymouth, then back to Torquay, where I finally stopped for a while to make BEAT Magazine.

It's not like a conscious choice to keep moving, think more just a natural inclination to keep things fresh. I think the habit is born from chasing after experience, as Byron put it -

“The great object of life is Sensation - to feel that we exist - even though in pain - it is this "craving void" which drives us to gaming - to battle - to travel.."

I think from an outlook acquired such as this, you realise one particular, and fundamental truth in life. Everytime you move, you bare witness to a different side to your character - feel your character, your sensibilities etc, swayed and tested in new ways. You see more clearly who you are when you attack your sensibilities from such a variety of angles. e.g with me, living up North, dropped into working in a pub, it was interesting to see how 'I' would react. Or living in a hostel in Brighton for a few months, seeing how 'I'd' respond to new surroundings. It's all about jumping in at the deep end and learning to swim in a totally new way.

Doing so helps unravel certain traits, helps peel back the opinions and characteristics we assume are fundamental to our characters, fundamental to 'us'

I spose evidence can be found in the reverse: It's typical that in a place, people are very simillar - not just in terms of accent & features etc, but likewise in terms of their beliefs and opinions. This is only natural, and part of the innocent communitas we seek as humans - were social creatures afterall, and want to get along. But people often feel scared to voice something that makes them seperate from the norm. e.g the football fan who has a secret love of reading, or the girl in the small town who doesn't actually have a desire to gossip or for the sewing circle about her.. 

Leaving helps you realise the variety in the world, and that it's ok to be your own way. Gives you the integrety to say 'OK, they're that way here. I don't feel affinity with that but I know out there, elsewhere, people do. Lets go find 'em '.


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Further
Eventually, perhaps also, we realise a deeper truth. When you keep chipping away at 'who you are' (which is really who & what your ego has decided to associate with), eventually you get to the point when you just realise, 'wow, we're just all energy, were just all ripples of the big bang going this way and that'. We're all nature at heart. But anywho, this is somethin' I'm still learning about, or moving towards; first you gotta understand it ('stand under' it - appreciate it) then you gotta realize it (make your 'reality' (aint it nice when words offer secret truth's like that?)). I certainly understand it, but realizing it is fleeting, not constant. Unravel your ego baby!

If this last bit has sparked an interest in you, like I said, I won't say much more, but would certainly point you in the direction of 'A New Earth' by Eckhart Tolle. Likewise I would urge you to look at the contentedness in the eyes and manner of someone such as the Dalai Lama. They got it. Peace.


Meditation for animation

These last few years i've got really keen on Buddhism. I think in the West, we have a natural inclination towards Eastern outlook, for its difference to our historical thought. For its general relaxed demeanour to religion.. there are many reasons. Buddhism in particular garners a weight of that leaning.

I got into meditation properly right after uni when I moved to Mevagissey for a bit (to live with Miguel). Because it was so quiet there and peaceful in the quiet harbour, mornings were ripe for being still and quiet.

I got into it for a few reasons; one being that natural inclination for sure, also that I am a keen reader, and focus & concentration are important for reading; skills practicing meditation would surely enhance. I don't mean to sound so robotic about it, as I don't feel that way.

I think meditation is becoming more important to the West too as an antidote to our busy lives. Everything is on, always, phones in ears always, sideways thoughts on hectic highstreets.. we are naturally lusting for that 'minute' of silence, the chance to get our minds back to 'now'. It's all about 'Being here now'.

I also got into it as I knew how it'd help my animation practice. Here's a few ideas on why its conductive to animation;

In meditation, especially the practice of mindfulness, we look over our bodies, bit by bit, feeling in every inch of the body. Feeling the pull of individual acute aches & being aware of your anatomy.
I find this technique very close to how I feel in life drawing. In life drawing you're not only looking at some other body, but trying to relate that feeling in your own body - that weight, the fall of things, the pull on intricate & hidden muscles that cause tension on the surface.. If you can draw focus to your own body, and help imitate the flow and feel of what you're looking at, you can understand it on a deeper level, that serves to improve the understanding in your own drawing. If you can feel it you can see it. Or notice it, rather.

Simillarily, in mindfulness we practice watching our breath. This is a fundamental technique, in that the breath serves as an anchor we can always return to, like a mantra. The breath is constant, so-necessary, yet we are often not concious of it, we just do it. Also, by controlling our breath, we can control our mood - slow deep breath's and all that..
So, in watching the breath, we as animators can begin to articulate all those subtle movements in the chest that we never usually notice. We can follow the breath down into the belly, fill your lungs from bottom-up, and roll it back out like a wave, feel it tickle out our noses calmly. Articulating like this is to recall that intricate eye we strive to acquire in animation. To be able to look in such detail is key.

Cultivating that pointed, focused, contcentration in meditation helps us in animation too. Animation is a long and sometimes laborious task that takes dedication and patience. It is good to have us held there content. This is a great antithesis to the inevitable procrastination that waves over you. Like in the Zen saying, 'Dont just do something, sit there!'. Disciplined patience.

I find too in meditation I am often beginning to imagine some obscure mental parable, in line with the practice. often revolving around the breath. Here's a couple, just for example of what I mean, because of course these are steeped in subjectivity:
 - I often visualize my breath like a wave rolling on the shore, from the deep of my lungs, rolling its way up my chest, out of my mouth.
 - I will often have two images in mind too - or one that contorts to the sway of my breath. E.g to meditate on a face that droops and relaxes as my body does with the breath, and pulls tight as I breathe in anew.
 - Also I like to picture a flower, growing. It begins in the dirt, the mess of wantaway life, and, rising through, pulling straight in the stem, unveils its petals in buddha-wisdom. The lotus flower that grows wherever. 'This is the moment of embarking, all auspicious signs are in place'. I remember that in meditation, and it helps garner in me this blossoming flower metaphor.

There is so much more, the idea of satori too - cultivating a quiet mind, that lights up with that great spark of idea. We can't control, or number, the amount of 'moments' we will have like this, visionary moments, the lightbulb flicking on (eurika!) (called satori's in the east, but usually reserved for monastic thought), but we can help by putting ourselves in fertile ground, and staying well watered.

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I'll leave it there. Let me know if you see it likewise, or have anything to add.

oil inspiration

Bin getting really into Duncan Grant & Vanessa Bell's paintings recently. I find some of theirs are in a simillar direction to what I want to do with my oils.




With these ones, I like how well the person sits with the nature around them, soaked into it. Really like how the strokes all come together, flowing in different directions to create the shape. The lottery of colour weaved and winding a figure out the Earth (like a wave out the ocean). I think the lack of detail on the faces especially adds to this too - no real personal distinction, its just a person in some shape, just as you may paint a flower arching in some shape.

This is probably the best example:


This one especially, the face kinda rises out of the foliage. The darkened outlines too on his knees and his right shoulder lean him outwards too and give him a slight distinction.

Oil Paintings

so continuing on from the last post, bin keeping at oil paintings. Just doing my third at the mo, and having a break inbetween.

As I said before, what I'm enjoying most is the way you can mix oils on the canvas. I'venever enjoyed colour, its always been a finnicky point for me, but I spose that's because I never went near a theory book for it or tried to understand how. Using oils gives me the time to do this, by practicing it, and learning as I go along.

Anywho here's the second one I did, its of me nan.

Quite happy with this one, though not really as its not what I was going for.

What I want to do with oils, is have the paintings be really loosely defined at the edges, then all come together in the focal point (in this instance that'd be the face) What I'd change is have the outer edges of the painting - eg the shoulders - be really loose & abstract, all paint splodges coming together, like flower petals, rising up to make her face. I want all the splodges to feel like nature coming together to make something. The idea being that we are like waves; how waves rise up out the ocean and form for a minute and we point and say 'hey look its a wave', people are the same: We rise up out the Earth, form for a moment of time, 80 years or so, then fall back into it, like waves do.

This is the idea I want to imply with my paintings. Not capturing that at the mo, but I feel if I continue I will. I think at the mo its because I'm new to it and still toeing quite a conservative line. When I've got the confidence of the medium I'll be able to express what I mean properly.

With this in mind, I'm going to break one of my rules. I've always believed that an 'artist', be it a painter, writer, animator or whoever, should try their best with what they're trying to achieve (the message, not just the technical ability). if you're not trying your best your setting in stone a limit of your abilities that is lower, and is a harder standard to reach further from. Your also not developing. Hemingway summed it up neatly during a conversation with Fitzgerald (from his book A Moveable Feast):
"He had told me at the Closerie des Liles how he wrote what he thought were good stories, and which were really good stories for 'the post', and then changed them for submission, knowing exactly how he must make the twists that made them into salable magazine stories. I had been shocked at this and I said I thought it was whoring. He said that it was whoring but that he had to do it as he made his money from the magazines to have money ahead to write decent books. I said that I did not believe anyone could write anyway except the very best he could write without destroying his talent"
This 'destruction of talent' is the reason why I've chose to avoid the industry. Perhaps its pig-headed to do so, but I don't care, its only my opinion. Perhaps im setting myself up to fail, but again I don't care, I may end up 27 with no 'experience' behind me except my own subjective avenues but I'd rather explore them than some other pursuit. I also know its an ignorant perspective (ignorant of the virtues of the industry) but still the main thing I want to do is my own thing. I'd rather walk at my own pace & do that than be caught up in some whole other world.

But for painting with oils I'm going to break this for a moment; I think what I need to do is continue practicing: be conservative about it, if that's all I can do. Most of all I must just keep at it. Keep knocking them out and getting better technically. It's like Dylan said, 'Write ten songs a day, throw nine away'. The gems will begin to shine.

When I have my confidence with them, I'll be able to be freer with it and explore how I want to use them. I spose this is the standard way really - Picasso learnt to paint traditionally & realistically very well before he went into Cubism. Ralph Steadman too - he was a very accurate & articulate, traditional painter, painting landscapes and still life and such. He got his abilities up, then he met Hunter Thompson, got crazy, and his drawings completely changed..

My main inspiration, I'd say is still Kathe Kollwitz. I love her looseness. Altho she didn't work in oils (atleast that's not what she's known for) the way the lines curve & caress and disperse freely is (referring to the waves idea above) what I want to present.

Also love Lucien Freud just for the sheer thickness of his paint, & his auterial eye.

Also getting very into Duncan Grant & Vanessa Bell. I think these two touched on what I want to do at times, and in their varied exploration threw up some interesting ideas.

If you know anyone else I should look into, let me know. 

I do find I'm very 'conservative'. Painting, writing & such you learn things about yourself (for an auteur POV), infact it was playing Chess I really realised how conservative I am. My friend I usually play with would make big sweeping moves - throw the Queen out into the centre ground within a few moves - whilst I'm there, hushing my pawns along, little by little. As I've got more confident with chess, I've began making bigger sweeping moves, this will be the same for painting, in time.

Right, time to get back to it. Will post the painting up when done. Not liking it at the mo, but must keep my integrety, not let the Lilly Briscoe blues take over, and just keep at it.

Peace

the other path

Following on from what I wrote about students attending university, I want to make clear the other path has equal & contrary merit.

NOTE - Reference to university is made in a general sense, although specifically is about my own ballpark (the arts). I'm sure it will encompass other subjects also, but some it will not

In short, uni for me was great to have those three years to really focus on growing (being like a sponge and soaking everything up), the chance to sit down and get on with it, but also the support, and especially the motivation to do so, something that I thought was necessary for me to keep me chained to my work station.

However, I feel strongly that someone, with enough conviction (strong emphasis on the word conviction) can simply (but not easily) do it on there own.

I always felt that, to take the example of a photographer, you don't need the best equipment, you don't need a Canon 5D or expensive tripod & lighting kit; most of all you need ambition, desire, commitment & conviction in yourself. Someone who has those will go out with a £2 camera and shoot everything they wanna shoot in total passion.

One of the best people I've met in the last year is my friend Steve, he didn't go to university, but has all these attributes in abundance for his field (singer / songwriter / music). Talking to him about uni, his idea was that he saw all these people going off for three years and thought 'how do I play catch up?' How do I do that without spending a penny?

Having not gone to university, you stand in the distinct advantage of not being anywhere between £20,000 to £75,000 in debt, and yet (potentially) as well qualified as your competitive peers who did attend university. Altho this may make you shiver in your boots with denial, it is true. Considering that your specialty is a creative venture; qualification comes in the form of a strong portfolio & passed clients, rather than A*'s & B's or 1:1's.

What you don't have is the three years spent with an open-pass to exploring your subject of choice in that prosperous bubble. There are great virtues to be hand from attending university. However, this is where your unspent £20,000-£75,000 comes in - see it as your golden ticket. Live cheaply (at home or in cheap rented accommodation) & get well acquainted with your camera, lightbox, canvas, (whatever). Use the local library to read about them technically, explore the worlds galleries online & keep up with contemporary trends: whatever you want, use the internet to aid it. Make the internet your new best friend and keep your use of it virtuous. Watch endless Youtube tutorials, and not just from nobodies, from masters in their fields, explaining it all intricately. Converse with the multitudes of people on the same path as you, online, get to the bottom of whatever it is you want to get to the bottom of. Be your own boss & push yourself: Schedule yourself a course as if you were a student - an hours researching in the morning, a photoshoot/studio session at mid day. DONT compare your efforts to those around you else you'll get stuck in first gear (unless your blessed with a vibrant & active home town)

You just gotta have the conviction in yourself, most of all.

This is hard, I don't think I could have done this, I think I would have wavered personally. This has been my plight since finishing uni, to write my own course of study (in the books I read, things I do) and keep developing with the same will & wings I developed at uni. But it's tough.

It's also hard to convince those around you that this is a virtuous path. Uni is almost like a free-pass in this regard, your family will determine that 'My son? He's at uni..' with pride and contentment. For them to see you take the other path and say 'He sits in his room and reads books and draws pictures' doesn't hold as much weight in societies eyes. But the one who does it with self-infused conviction, commitment, passion, and everything else, will be a very wealthy fellow.

busy bein' born: a pat on the back to students everywhere

There's a certain brand of cynicism regarding students that you hear from time to time, with even the employment minister Esther McVey recently branding students as 'snobs' who should work for Costa, but there's a very valid case for the worth of students to society.

University is a chance to exist within a bubble, a safe-haven where although you're likely skint, you're skint in the 'beans on toast' sense, rather than the anxious, over-bearing dread that comes part & parcel of being 'real world poor'. It's a bubble where for three + years you have few commitments besides your course of study, and are free to focus on your work, and your own chosen path within that framework.

One of my favorite things about returning to Falmouth University recently was to see all these young people walking about, each with a young-scrunched up face, lost in the thought of their own creation; perhaps trying to figure out some new thing or tie loose ends of there own desires. Each with their feet on the ground and their heads in the clouds.

Uni is a bubble where the freshness of youth can transpire to great things. We see this most voicefully in the sciences, where new ways of doing things, new potions and tonics for societies ills are remedied. Its my belief that cancer won't be cured by some government think tank or multi-million pound contract, but someday - perhaps on the offchance - in some university laboratory.

We see it too in my field, the arts. Art in the 'real world' has a habit of being a grand echo chamber, with icons of the past (1) repeated with tired acclaim (2). Unfortunately the acclaim most modern art receives tends to be thanks to its value in auction houses & ticket prices rather than its true worth to us.

Good universities are what Socrates would refer to as midwives: breeding grounds for newness. In the real world, under the shade of capitalism, great artistic ventures can be cast aside as phantom-plans, when really it is only the smell of money they do not engineer. At uni you have none of those obligations (the need to make work that is financially viable) and so you set off on your ways for other, more sentimental means.

Its the job of all students to take their three years and grasp them with both hands. It is a time of limitless prosperity for themselves as a person, and themselves as an artist, thinker, scientist, whatever. To be in that bubble, surrounded by like-minded folk, all pointed - with fresh insightful vigour - to the future, is a real opportunity for growth. With the right attitude, students bloom not only with their subject, but as people, growing rounded & worldy in lecture halls & libraries, in conversation & relations.

People often chastise the outlook of students as dreamers and idealists, and yes often this is fair criticism. However it is in this naive, playful wonderings that we find the most concentrated effort of new thought. Naive stabs in the dark, yes, fair; but one of them will hit the mark.

I'm a big believer in youth, I think your early 20's is the perfect time for newness. Much like footballers, you have the risk-taking naivety of youth that implores you to try new things, the (virtuous) confidence/arrogance to dignify your vision with great integrity, and are physically & mentally at your peak. You've also not been trodden with the ways of the real world enough to lose any of this. It's a time when the 'folly of enthusiasm' is all around, and the indifference of wisdom' is distant & unheard.

That's about all. A pat on the back to students everywhere.

Sincerity part 2 featuring Bobby D

Following on from thinking about the importance of sincerity to art (first bit).

'Art' you can think of as 'articulation'. We forget that though words are vast and can be bent to present a fathomable 'articulation' of what we want to say, they are weak, loose-fitting definitions that can never fully pronounce what we really want to express. If we agree with W.Benjamin that works of art are mere deathmasks of the original (link, number 13), then words are merely pale stabs in the dark.

Talking about her husbands lyrics, Olivia Harrison (George's wife) said "George usually referred to the lyrics of Bob Dylan when trying to make a point or elucidate his own feelings of isolation and frustration brought about by things in and beyond this life. Many times he said "I wish I knew more words", but perhaps all the words in the world, including the Sanskrit and mantras integral to his vocabulary, could not fully express his depth of feeling and realisation"

This is true of all of us, and its the reason a certain song (or painting, poem, anything) can be so cherished for us in moments of heartbreak (or joy); they seem to pronounce so much more what we are trying to articulate than our words ever could.

This I feel is in the succincticity of all parts strung together; the melody, the beat - fast or slow, & the lyrics themselves, all joining, working together to relay the depths of what we feel inside & wish to express.


A very good example of this is Dylan on the track 'Positively 4th street'. (Note - A good example if you are  familiar with his other work, so apologies for my rose-tinted view) On this song Dylan sounds defiantly self-righteous, so scornful to his ex in lyrics that kick off with "You got a lot of nerve, to say you are my friend, when I was down you just stood there grinning".
However its not only in his lyrics but in the self-righteous way he sings them, the beat of the drum chugging away, and the melody which sweeps in and commands a sense of resolution to the scene he portrays. This ain't Charlie-Chaplin-Dylan caught in play-rhymes or serious contemplative solemn Dylan like we've heard in previous songs; this is him with his back up & his tail withdrawn from beneath his legs.

Words alone can't command such articulation. For example the lyrics themselves could be imagined in a broken, detached voice, distant and silently self-righteous. But the character he presents is one we can all find within ourselves when the time calls.



Another example, which is perhaps more widely recognised, would be Sinead O'Connor on Nothing Compares to you. Again, the words, her articulation of those words, and the simple, sad karaoke-esque backing track all tie together. With this example, we have the video too, which sticks in your mind just as emphatically as the rest.

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On second thoughts, this post has a degree of hypocrisy when levied against the preivious post on the subject. Subjectively for myself, Dylan speaks volumes, however what's to say Christina Aguilera singing Diirty - written by someone else, perhaps not with her full 'sincerity' behind - can't speak with equal truth  for people as Dylan does? It's certainly sung with equal gusto, and afterall, art is in the eye of the beholder, regardless of its conception.

The same could be said for a Beyonce song (who I feel is simply playing the game) or a One Direction song (who, undeniably, are as factory-processed as they come). Is sincerity really fundamental?

I spose at the very least it's a great lynch-pin, if something is sincere, then it is worthy of consideration. If someone truly feels something then it is a statement to adorn the great human tapestry. Culture is a reflection of us, in our place & time - regardless of whether that's Sinead O'Connor singing despairingly about the death of her mother or Robin Thick singing ironically & testingly about rape.. Irony, malevolence & disdain are sincere emotions too afterall..

Then on another level, even if Robin Thick wasn't sincere, the reaction to it from the masses (people unflinchingly dancing away) too tells us something to further our understanding of ourselves & our current condition (culture).

Anywho, thoughts thoughts thoughts. Roll on.

Her


Today one thing we are all drawn to think about is this sense of loneliness that pervades with social media. With growing melancholy, each of us, meandering slowly into a state of self-conformed isolation. When working long hours by yourself, stuck behind a computer in a room in a house, or perhaps during unfilled evenings, you may find yourself drawn to Facebook or checking emails etc: This is a lust for social interaction. It's a lust born from atavistic desires, the longing and necessity for community that is twice-trodden into the wellbeing of all humans and other beings. However, clicking through status updates, messaging long-lost friends - a solemn coldness is born of it all, and rather than fulfilling our lust we are left a little cold underneath.

'Her' comes to grips with this sense and shakes it in a not-too-distant future setting. It's not a fantastic film, a little unformed round the edges, but it does provoke questions in the way it envisions a plausible near-future. 

One thing that has concerned me recently regarding all this push towards a strange & detached future we're building for ourselves, is virtual reality headsets. I think right now they personify our vision and where we are headed. VR headsets will raise even more questions (and hopefully answer a few) about us and our needs. For example with a VR headset we will be able to lunch in East-side Manhattan, take an evening stroll along the Rialto and sleep in the comfort of our own beds; or perhaps have a dinner-date with a pal half way across the world, look around the restaurant, interact with other virtual-real people - imagine a virtual world populated with real people all walking around and interacting from the comfort of their own front room.  

 I have contradictory feelings towards it, on the one hand the teenage boy inside of me rears his head and shouts 'Wow! Amazing'  It's the same way I feel about cloning; it's messed up, the wrong path to tread for what we truly desire (contentment, peace), however its bloody marvelous and a testament to the genius of humans; we have gone so far down this path why not push it as far as we can and see what happens, perhaps that will be the footnote of the human lifespan of this Earth.

On the otherhand though I feel it'll only raise more questions about what humans really need. VR Headsets will further the question Facebook proposes & the lust for social interaction. Despite all this interaction and lottery of possibilities, will we too, when we remove the helmet and feel the real world, really be left cold and detached? In social interaction, is there something tangible in 'feeling' the other person, their energy & subconscious bonds? & if so will all this technology really offer any solutions or just further the chasm?


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Anywho, one other thing that's raised is the thought (which I hadn't considered before) but if each of us had a device in our pocket that was so alive, so interested in us, new us personally & hung on every word, would that be of some beneficiary to our way of being? A personal PA that is unintrusive and dedicated to pushing us, caring about us etc. Would that make us all better? And if so who has the right sensibility and wisdom to design the psyche of such a tool? What virtues would be placated as THE virtues?

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With visions of the future, utopian or otherwise, I am always drawn to recall Aldous Huxley's Brave New World. The wearing of VR headsets, the fulfilling our time with distraction, is just another version of his Soma. It's just another way we can come home from work and distract ourselves until the next day. Or is it? Who knows.

Some wise words from the Dalai Lama:

"Man surprised me most about humanity. Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money.
Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health. And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived.”

sincerity



You could write this video off just as some wacky fella from Belgium. Do that aswell if you like, but it makes you think about sincerity. Note, assuming this is for real and not a joke.

Sincerity I think is key to art. If someone is saying something that they feel sincere about, from a  sociological angle we can use it to futher our understanding about the human endeavour. With this fella for example, he is obsessed with marbles. Bit odd, you might say, but it is an obsession nonetheless. If he was equally obsessed with something a little more usual, perhaps his body, working out, then we may not question it or write it off. 

This leads us to ask, why is it usual to be obsessed with your body/looks rather than something like marbles? They are both passions. Both worthless in the end, so why do we do them? Why do they make us happy & keep us compelled? Is it to be wrapped up in something that is the draw?

Anywho, hope I haven't lost you. But to turn back to sincerity. I find sincerity is key in art. Sincerity is the departure point from the audience to the work, from the audience to the soul of humanity itself. It is the departure point, meaning without that truthfulness & earnestness imbedded compounding every word, brush stroke, movement, how can we trust it?

Sincerity is key. Even if there ideal they are presenting is (perceived by you) wrong, sincerity enables you to trace it - where they coming from? At which point did there feeling become broken off from you're own, their eyes blemished & haized in this way? Trace that vein to the big human heart (we all want happiness, we all want to avoid suffering, we all live we all die). You can forgive innocence, you can accept a different opinion to your own if struck with conviction, you can emphasise - admire, pity, be GLAD for naivety etc etc. 

E.G the songwriter Elliot Smith. After listening to his album a few times I got bored of the whiny broken heartedness of it all. But that aint an act, it isnt something masqueraded or suggested by the record company. He's broke & sounds broke. He's sincere about it. This is the problem with people on X-Factor & modern pop music in general. They are told to 'sing joyful' or sing 'poignantly tragically' etc, but it ain't the truth of how they're feeling, there's nothing beneath the big bellyful singing.

Another example is the futurist art movement. I feel very little in common with the futurists, infact they are quite counter to my feeling about the world. They were people around the turn of the last century obsessed with what was going on around them & the optimism that bloomed from it - motor cars, big great feat's of architecture etc. They were wide-eyed at the new capabilities of man and heralded this new mechanical world they saw growing around them. They believed in a loss of humanity in the shadow of the machine. Marinetti, the leader of the movement, held great revolutionary opinions like "…destroy the museums, the libraries, every type of academy… …the great crowds, shaken by work, by pleasure or by rioting”… …We will glorify war – the world’s only hygiene – militarism, patriotism, the destructive gesture of freedom-bringers, beautiful ideas worth dying for, and scorn for woman.". I don't agree with this, but sincerity lets me see what led him to this point. 

Art to me is all about unrolling the endless truth of humanity. It's expression of everything in ways that words cannot suffice. As Bukowski put it "An intellectual says a simple thing in a hard way. An artist says a hard thing in a simple way." Without sincerity we ain't saying nothing atall, just treading dead water.


Digital Disatisfaction

Working on the magazine, most of my work recently has been done sat in the glare of a computer screen. It's been this way for a while now, when we were making Dark Descent we spent whole days sat behind a computer.

I think there's something strange that happens when you're on a comp. For example when animating at a computer, at the end of the day, you dont seem to feel the same level of satisfaction as you would if you'd spent the whole day working on paper & a light box. Same for writers - filling 30 notebook pages is much more satisfying than a hundred Word document ones.. Even if you'd completed twice as much work, working digitally you are left feeling a little empty.

I think this is because of the loss of the whole physical game; When you're working with your hands, you've got this over here, this over there, you have to get out your chair, go get stuff, look through drawers etc etc. What'smore you can pick it up at the end of the day, move it about, look at it. It's there. Sat infront of a box, your whole work is created within the box & when the light blips off your work has vanished for the time being.

I'm not bashing the box; i'm a huge fan of computers, especially when it comes to animation; whole films can be made in the box goddamit! Go consult Ralph Bakshi .

So what it's all about for me is overcoming this digital dissatisfaction. A couple of things I do;
  • If i'm going to be working at a computer predominantly for the day, I lay out a little schedule. eg:-
1 hour - Draw up sketches for bla bla bla
3 hours - Design template layout for next issue
 -------1 hour - have lunch --------
2 hours - contact new contributors / advertisers
etc etc.

  • Another thing I think is important to do is to keep a list of all your achievements throughout the day. Whatever it is, it's nice to have a check list that you can look back at come the end of the day. Even things like 'updated the Magazine Facebook page'. It may seem small & needless to record, but it still took 20 minutes/an hour of your time.
  • Also, be active elsewhere in your life. I think this is why so many people are getting into running now; you spend all day at a desk, then go for a run, helps revert that inbalance in nature.
I find these little methods also stop me procrastinating so much, or atleast, help me be aware of when I am procrastinating. If you have a day schedule, regardless of how feeble it may seem, it still lets you be aware of the track you are on.

Also to be aware of how innumerably handy these little whirring boxes can be; sending out emails may seem simple, but look at your immense productivity! 40 years ago, writing all those letters, heading to the post-office, mailing them, that woulda taken some time..


Vegetarianism

I implore everyone who reads this blog to watch this documentary about human treatment of animals. A warning though - it's not the pleasantest way to spend an evening - infact rather harrowing - but very beneficial. It's also not '14 year old anarchist' material if you get me, it's spoken very plainly (by Joaquin Pheonix, no less) and factual.

Anywho, without further ado:


Just to clarify, none of the following is written with a hostile tongue, please don't read it as such.

There are a few defences for meat-eating, most often, people will defend it as 'the circle of life'. This is true to a degree, however, it's simply not necessary to eat animals in this day & age. Each species has a fantastic virtue, developed in the 'survival of the fittest'. For example a Leopard its speed. Sharks the ability to smell blood from a mile away. Birds, there intuitive ability to fly in formation. (Don't mention the sloth) We should use our fantastic virtue, our conciousness (I think, therefore I am) to be above murdering other being's.

Another defence for eating meat is farming being good for the environment. This is true in the idealistic image of farming - happy pigs, rolling fields, a bloke with a stick of hay in his mouth etc, but that isn't the truth of the world. Consider the impact of capitalism on farming. If they can make the quantity of their produce bigger, their production method cheaper, & any other means to undercut their business rivals  - of course, logically, they will. This has led to it's natural conclusion, demonstrated in the documentary above; The truth of modern farming is live chicken's on a conveyor belt - 'whats the most economical way to kill them?' capitalism asks; to have them catapulted into a brick wall at the end of the line, any live one's being stamped to death by steel toe capped boots. This actually happens. As if.

'It's natural to eat meat', true. But let's not pretend we are these all natural being's; Afterall, it's not natural to wipe your arse.

Oh and finally, I promise you, dinner is not boring without meat. At first it can be, when you're still stuck in the 'chicken & veg', 'sausage & mash' routine, but soon enough you'll be filling your plate with all the flavours of the world.

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I think it's important for people - not necessarily to become vegetarian's - but to understand that eating meat is a choice. Be aware of you're choice when you sit down to dinner; was it worth an animal's life for you to fill your belly for an hour or two?

A great benefit I have found from being a veggy is the moment that veil drops in your mind. I remember walking along a roadside with my pal and seeing a huge billboard for McDonald's. It was a massive blown up picture of a Big Mac. That moment I saw this as no different to it being a human corpse up there, blown up big, all bloodied & battered, resting inbetween two buns, the stench of death. Anywho this was the moment the veil came down in my mind, & I saw it for what it was. I feel that vegetarianism is a pathway to feeling the interconnectedness of the whole world & the beauty that permeates. Eating meat is the closed curtain:- children don't see the connection between those chicken's in a field & those chicken nuggets on there plate. Adults don't see the connection between a rare rump steak & a bloody cows arse. But this is a beautiful thing - the moment the veil drops & you're able to feel that compassion within, to a greater extent than you've felt before. As Tolstoy put it;

"This is dreadful! Not the suffering & death of the animals, but that people suppress in themselves, unnecessarily, the highest spiritual capacity - that of sympathy & pity towards living creatures like themselves" - Tolstoy
Do have a think about it. I see it as one of those things, once you have addressed it - looked yourself in the mirror & made the concious choice either 'I am okay with eating meat' or 'I don't want other animals to die for my dinner plate', you are able to reap the benefit I said above. It's good to abolish your ignorance, wherever you find it.

It helps you reckognise your own level of selfishness also - I don't mean to use this word as slander, I mean it in the true sense, how we are all selfish to some degree (the baby crying for milk, the man in a traffic jam kicking off about his right of way). Vegetarianism is simply saying i'm not cool with death for my dinner plate. It is not black & white - i've heard vege's chastised for walking on the ground incase they kill a worm, or whatever. My own level of selfishness finds it hard to extend any further passed vegetarianism. For example into being a vegan. I would love to, & have great admiration for vegans, but it's too much for me, too much of a lifestyle choice in terms of money & time spent pursuing the cause. This is where my selfishness draws the line - the simple practicality of being a veggy.

If you're interested in giving it a go, check out this great initiative set up by Paul McCartney.
http://www.meatfreemondays.co.uk/

Re:Papers papers papers... and the future!

Brotherly Love
A humongous event here at Mickey Mouse Has Grown Up a Cow (aka Tom Gameson's blog).. we have my first ever guest poster! Comes straight from the lips of ma boy Jimbo Cox, read it and believe..
As someone who, since turning eighteen, has always been employed (including through university, entirely) and has never been on benefits, I think the dole is fantastic. The safety net it provides is an element of our country I am proud of.
In my opinion, benefits will always be abused, but denying people money that need it because of this abuse by others is evil.
I find it very interesting that The Conservatives inherited a ‘’broken Britain’’ according to many, yet people are less moved by the fact that The Red Cross are giving donations to homes in The U.K for the first time since the Second World War this winter. To me this shows that people consider being unable to buy a third family car due to Labour policies including benefits being exploited (when really it was a global financial crisis) more ‘’’broken’’ than people on your street receiving aid usually reserved for third world countries in crisis. And that is harrowing.
I do find it strange how some benefit receivers appear to live so wealthily, for example, a mate of mine back home who has a pregnant girlfriend and a son bought my TV off me (that I needed money for) to put in his bedroom! His girlfriend does not work and I work a lot harder than him, yet he has a lot more for himself. Perhaps this is because I spend my money on plane tickets. Truthfully, I don’t seek the reason, because I don’t care. To be perfectly honest, I don’t give a shit if people forever abuse these benefits they receive. Let’s go by Daily Mail-esque example. If a Polish immigrant’s lazy nature and subsequent benefits are what prevents a middle-class man from buying a 50 inch TV to watch X-Factor on then that is fine by me, the only part I am sickened by is that this man is watching X-Factor (why is it that people buy big screens to watch the shittest television on?). If an overly rewarding benefit system is what prevents the disparity between rich and poor from being so huge then I highly endorse it (and I say this as someone who, when I finally decide to enter it the real world, is aiming as high up the career ladder as I can go).
Any way, that’s my two cents, we could make a blog together man, across the hemispheres! I got a lot of ideas about what to write about, from politics to more light hearted subjects.
Peace
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If anybody else has anything to add on the subject (the dark side of the dole) then please, feel free to send in - whether onside or on the contrary its very interesting to here those perspectives we don't often hear in our 'who shouts the loudest' society

Papers papers papers... and the future!

This is interesting to read:

Article one (Daily Mail) (by Richard Littlejohn...)
Article two (Response posted on blog / republished on The Guardian)

Really highlights how those poor poor papers like the Daily Mail like to build one-dimensional characters of real people before they ask the public to stone them.

The Daily Mail is much like Stweart Lee said about Jeremy Clarkson.. "Ooh that Jeremy Clarkson, with his outrageous political views that he has for money..". This is the cream of 20th century capitalism.

I've been doing a business course for the last month & one lady on the course is a Liverpoodlian (don't think i've spelt that right). Being a Liverpoodlian (person from Liverpool..) it didn't take long for conversation to turn to what paper she buy's, & her opinion of the Sun. (See image)

She said something very interesting about the way society responds to their own communities, and those people in need of support. 40 Years ago, it would have been a case of 'Aah, Derek next door has lost his job, lets take a food basket round'. Today it's 'F##kin scroungers'.

My belief in the dole, or that is - the spirit behind the dole, is mirrored in Jack Monroe's article; isn't it fantastic that we can offer a safety net as such, to support those in need. This may provoke a grey area, prone to misuse; but what is a better alternative?

One thing people have to remember, like Richard Littlejohn, the Daily Mail & most importantly those members of the public whose ignorance is wrongly played upon by such papers - and this I believe is something noone is really drawing attention too - more & more jobs are being exhanged for even cheaper labour. When you go into Tesco's & go through self service, that used to be someone's job. Every industry has had - with varying degrees of influence - the microscopic eye drawn over it's productivity & where costs can be kept down, and often this is in staff. I'm not saying this is wrong, this is the end result of capitalism and financially logical.

However we have to remember this - what happens when most jobs are filled by robots?

Eventually it'll be expected that only 80% of the population can find work, then 50% and so on.When all jobs are dried up & we no longer critisice those who don't work, I believe we'll have built towards some sorta landscape where everybody does what they want to do. I'm talking creatively. The internet is bringing an audience to those who have something to show, whatever little niche creative venture that may be. Technology is going to massively facilitate this creativity too.

I believe that a new culture of naive art is soon to grow. This is totally spurred on by three key things;

  1. The creative drive (which we all have)
  2. The internet Not only with it's value in sharing, but in the very idea of 'an open book'. We today tend to go on the net and go on a select few sites - the children of the future are going to go on it and dream up anything they want - which really confounds 'an open mind' philosophy.
  3. and the tools of the 21st century that will make that creative drive possible (3D printers in the hands of a jeweller! Even myself using one computer in one room to make whole animations on)


A good example of this 'naive art' is already all around us, Facebook, Instagram & the like are making artists out of everyone. Naive artists that is - a new folk art.

Anywho - the overarching point of this is - we are at a cross roads, a gigantic shift in the way the world works. This is very much the final days of 20th century capitalism, and those big pigs are gunna keep squarwking with their dollars and trying to stop the change (see the music industry...). I believe this is the end of a 2000-yearlong era, we've been living in the shadow of the Roman's for that time, culture has not much changed (they had fast food in Pompeii, & is there really much difference between the Colosseum & the San Siro?)

People have to be aware of this shift and excited about the possibilities of the future we're stepping into. Whether they are as wide-eyed optimistic as me or not, they must realise that things are changing in a new way and it is very much an open book.

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Here's an example of how art & creativity are beautifully realised with the internet

Two contradictory states of mind...

...That is modern life.

I find at the moment my days move between two modes of thought. On the one hand, I very much believe in mindfulness. It's something i've got into over the last few years, beginning when my friends dad lent me 'The Miracle of Mindfulness' as an in roads to Buddhism. Mindfulness is the attaining of the ability to sort of at once be clear minded but also directly focused; it is the cultivation of this ability. Also, inherently moulding a mindset that says "Wow! We are here! What are the chances?" and really basking in the joy of this. To quote some wise man - "The miracle isnt to walk on water; the miracle isnt to fly; The miracle is to purely walk on Earth".

At the same time, I find myself very given over to the '21st century scizophrenic' mindset that Jameson outlayed. That today with all the signs, all the morsels of information that line our streets & days, we have become almost scizophrenic in our thought process - we absentmindedly jump from one ship to another in mind, thoughts of 'whats for lunch' one second, then suddenly, without concious reason, thoughts of a dead pet, or murmers of an ex girlfriend spring the next. We are sort of rolled from the beginning of days to the end picking up signs and churning them in such way. It's a rather disparaging way to think, atleast, when levied alongside the clear virtues of 'mindfulness'; However I find for the creative thinker its a rather attainful way to think. I find thinking like this, ideas spring up out of nowhere, tangents are thought-up and felt-out; a brisk walk back home from the shops may be the kiln for a feverous new idea, built on nothing more than seeing a car drive by or a bird fly low.

It's a mindset that Virginia Woolf personified in To The Lighthouse, perhaps only now (almost 100 years later) we have cranked it all the way to 11 in our 21st century ways. An absolute overdrive of information as you walk the streets, or look around your room (much different from the simple Victorian fixings she would have surrounded herself with). Standing still, how many labels can you read? How many ideas are in ear-shot?

So this is my contradiction of thought-process. On the one hand I am very fond of attaining that fruitful insight that mindfulness brings, but on the other, I like to be the pebble dropped in the river, washed this way & that from wave to wave. I find myself cushioning up in either way, from one day to the next. For animating, I find the mindful thought-process the best; being all over the place (mentally) absorbs you in elsewhere ideas when trying to animate & before long you find yourself hunched over Facebook or the kettle, procrastinating.